Showing up

I have less than one week before my flight back to the US, which I'm still wrapping my mind around. This year has taught me much and pushed me in ways I could have never expected. Yesterday was my last Friday at Itipini, and I got to spend time with some of my greatest teachers. On Fridays after the clinic closes, high school students from the community come for Study Skills sessions. Over the past several months a "regular crew" has formed, and we gather to talk about what's going on in school, at home, and to work on homework together.

I'm grateful for our time together and look back happily over our mutual growth. Starting back in November with the help of Ben, who was a fellow volunteer at Itipini for three months, we began meeting on a regular basis. Megan Berry was also a huge help in tutoring, working with local schools, and reminding us all to have a good sense of humor. Awkwardness around language barriers and my inability to remember trigonometry surrounded many of our first gatherings. Since then, we've come to know more of each others' stories. Many of these kids have less than ideal home situations and attend schools lacking in resources. Siziwe (pictured below) and her sister Khayakhazi are attending 11th and 12th grades respectively. This year they have lost both of their parents to AIDS and tuberculosis. They now care for their younger brother along with their own children with the help of neighbors. The pain and loss they have experienced this year is great, and their responsibilities have jumped tremendously. However, they are working to not let this pain define them, and continue showing up.

Classroom at Itipini Junior Secondary School where most children from Itipini attend grades 1-9

Drop out rates in the Eastern Cape are staggeringly high, and this certainly rings true in Itipini. Home environments not conducive to studying (no electricity, no running water, lack of privacy, sometimes little or no parental support) and school environments that are also challenging (few textbooks, teacher-less classrooms, no school transport, socio-economic discrimination) make the path to passing the matriculation exam in twelfth grade a daunting task for many.

Figuring out how to best support and encourage our students has been a challenge, and I think in many ways it is about showing up. Showing up on Fridays to provide a space for them to work together on homework. Showing up at school to talk to their teachers when a parent has died. Showing up when they come to me with a problem at home or school, and listening. They have taught me this through their own living examples of continuing to show up--at school, on Fridays, and to responsibilities at home that are many. Consistency and presence are sometimes all we can offer, but that is a great gift. They return that gift to me by continuing to come on Fridays, and by sharing their joys and sorrows during the week. These young men and women have been some of my greatest teachers this year, and I am humbly thankful for our time together. They have taught me the importance of showing up and not giving up, and that has been a great, great lesson.

Luleka, Siziwe, Nonzaliseko, Nocwaka, Baliswa, and Zukile

Transparent Time

Just before I left for Mthatha, I sat down for dinner with both of my parents at our kitchen table that has the giant legs which make for excellent footrests and the worn spots on its center from years of dishes being placed upon its grain. That table has been my kitchen table for all twenty-three years of my life, and gathered around it were the two most important people to me. We sat and ate and talked like we had many times before when I was younger, and honestly there was no better way for me to spend my time before leaving. A meal shared together was one of our last acts as a family before my year in South Africa began.

In thinking back over these seven months, meals shared together stand out as a theme. Whether it be lasagna night at Jenny's on Wednesday, lunch on a hot Sunday afternoon in a one room church, gathered around a table with eleven of the most remarkable young men I've met at Sabelani Home, or a braai (Afrikaans term for a BBQ) with other volunteers as a storm rolls in, these times shared together stand out. Here I feel nourished both my the food we consume, but also by the conversations that unfold. Around these tables of various shapes and sizes, there is time to decompress, to laugh, to share, and to learn a new part of someone's story. These are moments of transparent time.

"A sacrament is when something holy happens. It is transparent time, time which you can see through to something deep inside time....Needless to say, church isn't the only place where the holy happens. Sacramental moments can occur at any moment, any place, and to anybody. Watching something get born. Making love. A high school graduation. Somebody coming to see you when you are sick. A meal with people you love. Looking into a stranger's eyes and finding out he's not a stranger. If we weren't blind as bats, we might see that life itself is sacramental."

Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking

Storytelling

The video link below was one that was shared with our YASC group while we were in Toronto. Novelist Chimamanda Adichie describes her own experiences with stories and finding your voice. It has helped me a lot in thinking about the power of stories and my own role in sharing them over the next year. When you have a few minutes, take a look. Also, TED Talks in general are pretty great, so check them out.

TEDTalks: Chimamanda Adichie

Peace be with you, and let us walk together.